I had it upside down

Wasted time equals a neglected page. Never thought I would admit something like that. It’s been said to me many times throughout my life but somehow I seem to get by. But I’ve had some time to really reflect this past week or so and I’ve learned a few things about myself that aren’t very flattering.

Toss in the topics I’ve been preaching on the last few weeks and oh boy.

Let’s start by saying that self-reflection has never been my strongest trait. I tend to find what I like and stick to it. I’m not saying that I’ve never had a wake up moment but they are pretty rare. It’s easier for me to slide into the sin of pride than I’d like.

I take a lot of things in my life for granted and if those granted things go away I have a powerful tendency to turn my back on them. New things will come right? But what if I’m wrong? My strategy seemed to work for me. What if I had done things differently?

I know it’s a waste of time to dwell on the past. But what if it’s not?

If you look over my old posts you’ll see two characters pop up a lot.



I wrote about my struggle with these two and which was winning. I think my struggle is real but my analysis flawed. Let me explain briefly as an intro.

I always thought that Worthwhile ought to win but it was my pride that made me feel Worthwhile. Getting knocked down a peg or two and suddenly I’m Worthless and fighting to regain my stubborn pride, thinking I’m winning.

Sometimes I’m a moron.

Father God, all praise to You who created me. Forgive my sin of pride. Bless my mother who bore me, bless my father too. Bless my children with my secret hope for them. Bless my wife who loves me in spite of my failures. Remove my pride even if it hurts. I yield to you. Let Worthless win. Amen

More to come

read or not, this one’s for me

It was a dark and stormy night

into my life she came

I didn’t know then

how I’d never be the same

She looked so scared and lonely

not like all the others

We knew we had to have her

no matter all the bothers

and so we brought her home

on that dark and stormy night

and we named her Chloe

Because that just seemed right

It was cold the night we brought her home

So we dressed her in a sock

She looked just like a longshoreman

working on a dock

I also her Sugar Mouse

Old Goose and My Baby

She was a tempest in a teapot

Fought her sister frequently

She was my friend for 16 years

No regrets have I

But it hurts that she is gone

it hurts I do not lie

but I knew cost when going in

I know that all dogs die

I leave you now with song and verse

the verse for you the song for her

I’ll honor her and love again

it’s worth the cost for sure

For who can prove that the human spirit goes up and the spirit of animals goes down into the earth?

Ecclesiastes 3:21

Snowy doughy Chloe

Noey doughy blowy

Bigga bigga bony nony

Digga Digga dony

Rigga rigga tony

Where’s little Chloe?

Goodbye my friend

a lesson in mercy

I was thinking today about Corrie Ten Boom, the Holocaust survivor. I used a story about her in a message that I preached recently. It was a story she told about returning to Germany for a speaking arrangement. After the speech was done she was approached by a man. To her horror she recognized him as one of the guards from Ravensbrück  concentration camp. According to Corrie this man approached her and complemented her speech. The speech she had given was about God’s mercy.

The man then confessed to her that he was a former guard from Ravensbrück , but that he had been converted to Christianity. He told her that he knew that God had forgiven him. He then stuck out his hand and asked this question:

“Fraulein , can you forgive me?”

All she could think abou.t was her sister Betsie who died a slow painful death in that place. But she then remembered Jesus words:

“But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.” Matthew 6:15 NIV

She said a quick prayer telling God she could put out her hand but He was going to have to supply the feeling. As soon as she clasped his hand she felt a warm tingling start in her shoulder that quickly went down to their handshake. She burst into tears and forgave him with all her heart.

That’s a really great story, but it’s what she said afterwards that has really got me thinking. She says she still struggled to forgive as time went on. She learned that good feelings and behavior can’t be stored up, but only drawn fresh from God each day.

That is such a great lesson. I find myself so often feeling discouraged by my lack of the ability to remain in a state of forgiveness. Then I beat myself for backsliding into unforgiveness. What Corrie’s story helped me realize is that’s ok. I don’t have to remain in that state because I can draw on God’s mercies every day. That’s why they are there. God has need to be merciful to Himself. The new daily mercies are there for me and for you.

Great is his faithfulness;
    his mercies begin afresh each morning.

Lamentations 3:23 NLT

Father God you are my Lord and God. I worship you alone. Forgive me the times I put things between You and me. I know that you love me to much to leave me the way I am. Thank you for giving fresh mercies everyday. Remind me of this continually so I can draw on You when I need to forgive, when I need to show mercy. Send to me a revival of mercies to give to all those around me. In Jesus name Amen.

just a prayer

Dear Heavenly Father You are the only one worthy of my praise, worthy of my worship. I honor You and believe in You. I believe that You created me for a purpose, and I count on You to guide my life such that that purpose will be revealed and accomplished.

I believe that you sent Your son, Jesus, to live among us perfectly, to bring us the Good News, to die on a cross and to rise again three days later to fully conquer sin and death. He is the Lord of my life.

I am sorry for all the times I’ve let you down. But I know that all my sin and iniquity are covered by His precious blood. Please continue to point out the error in my life so that my life will continually grow more pleasing to You.

Father God I am so troubled by the way events are going right now. We are more divided than we have been in America than at any time during my life. So many people are falling away from the faith or never even coming to it at all. Our leaders bicker and backstab. They are cowardly and lazy. There is corruption all around. We need You now more than ever yet You seem so far away.

Your Word says that all authority on Earth belongs to You. So take it away from those that use it for evil and harm. Deliver it instead to men and women that will use it in wisdom. Deliver to us justice and hope.

I am asking You to send revival to Your church. We are in dire need and only Your Holy Spirit can bring us back to life. Deliver to us the boldness and courage that we have lost. Prune any sin and error that You find.

For myself Father guide me in the way You would have me go. Bless the ministry that You have called me to. Stir up the Spirit that lives in me. Give to me good ideas and the courage to implement them. Let Your love shine through me so that all can see it. Mold me into a leader that You can use. Send revival and let it start with me.


Tribute to an old friend

When I came home from the army in 1986 I was 23 years old. I took a job at the family business and went back to school. My grandfather was the boss at work. Most every day he would arrive just before opening time with a box of doughnuts and the first thing he’d do once he got in was turn on the radio so he could hear the news.

He would grumble a little bit about it cause you know Reagan and then move on with the day. But at 9am the station format changed away from the news to a local talk show. And boy did grandpa hate that guy.

I couldn’t figure out why. To me he was smart and funny. He was a little bit over the top sometimes but I thought he was mean or hateful. That never even crossed my mind. I’m talking about Rush Limbaugh.

By 1986 I’d been able to vote twice in presidential elections. I’d happily cast my votes for Ronald Reagan. First time because I thought Carter had been a poor president and second because I thought Reagan had been a good one. If you had asked me I would have told you I was a conservative but I probably wouldn’t have been able to give you concise reasons why.

Rush changed all that for me. As I listened I began to be interested in what he was saying. His brand of conservatism made a lot of sense to me. His breakdown of liberal or socialist ideas and his refutation of the same spoke eloquently to my inner conservative. And of course he was funny.

I remember one time he was doing a bit about backwards satanic messages on records. He was playing Slim Whitman “backwards” and he revealed a hidden message. Well a man called in to the show and told Rush that he had the same album but he couldn’t get the backwards message to play.

Well Rush couldn’t let that one go. He sent the caller on a wild goose chase for a “disgronificator”. Because that was the piece of equipment needed to hear the messages hidden on the albums. The poor fellow believed him and went in search of said equipment.

This was very spontaneous on Rush’s part. Because the message on the Slim Whitman record was so obviously a parody made because these types of messages were in the news. To have a caller believe it was genuine just made it more funny. But that’s what Rush did, he used parody, satire, and humor to point out the ridiculous in society and the news.

Rush you brought me in to the conservative fold and taught me how to be better at it. You made me think and you made me laugh. You can’t really for more from your favorite talk show than that. You served us well and will be missed. Rest In Peace Rush Limbaugh. You can finally give God His talent back and untie the other half of your brain.

I’ll never be a socialist

Since I have been alive on this planet there have been eleven different presidents of the United States of America. Five of them Democrats and six Republicans. Now obviously I didn’t really have thoughts or opinions bout those that served when I was a child. My first real memory of politics was from the early seventies when Nixon was running against McGovern.

I remember having arguments with the other kids on the playground. When I say arguments of course I mean taking sides based on what our dads were saying at home and shouting at each other about things we didn’t understand. My dad’s guy was Nixon and so was mine. It was great fun but in the end we all loved America and wanted the best for everyone. The teachers loved America. The students loved America. The administration loved America. We all had that in common. At least as far as I knew.

There have been people that have looked for reform as long as there has been a country. And that’s a good thing. How else are things going to get better? But does that mean that all reforms are good or necessary? I don’t believe so. The system may seem slow but it gets the job done.

America works best when individuals strive for their own betterment. That’s why I’ll never be a socialist or communist. These ideologies are not interested in individuals but rather in groups or collectives. Leftist revolutions always pit people groups against one another. That’s why socialists and communists hate God. Because God values the individual not the group or identity. When it comes time for me to meet my maker He’s not going to say to me “Well Peter since you’re a white man you get a free pass to glory”. God doesn’t care what your identity is at all except for your identity in Christ.

When you realize this, that each person matters individually, it lays to rest this idea of identifying primarily as a group. Now understand I’m not saying that having an identity group is a bad thing. We all like to hang out with those in which we have things in common and that’s ok. The problem comes when this becomes an us against them winner take all proposition. Just take a look at California today to see how that works out. Even Willie Brown says it’s a problem.

I want to remind you that God says “Love your neighbor “. It’s easy to to love or hate people as a group. It becomes much harder to take those feelings and apply them to individuals.

Is there an identity group that you have a problem with? Do dislike or even hate middle aged cis-gendered white men? That’s what I am. Let’s talk. Do you hate Republicans? That’s what I am. Let’s talk. Do you think church folk are all hypocrites? I’m church folk. Let’s talk.

I am all of those things and so much more. Yet none of those define me. I challenge each of you to lay aside your cookie cutter ideas of what people are based upon some perceived identity and get to know people as individuals. Step away from your prejudice for just a minute and give it a try. You might be surprised.

Father God, please forgive us for lumping people created as individuals uniquely in Your image into broad groups and then judging them based solely on which group we assign them to. Help us to see people the way that you do. In Jesus name. Amen

A letter to Worthless

Dear Worthless,

I’ve noticed you coming around a little bit more often lately and I don’t appreciate it at all. I thought we had finally ended our relationship for good. I see that I was mistaken.

I have to tell you that I’m really tired of how you waltz into my life at the worst possible time. Things seem to be going along just fine and them you show up looking all sweet and innocent. Your sad hungry eyes get me every time. So I give in and feed you a little bit. I say to myself “I deserve a little self pity. I’ve been working hard and no one seems to notice or care”. Next thing you know we’re having a full blown pity party.

And yeah it feels good at first releasing all that pent up stuff inside. The self doubt, the anxiety, little hurts that were easy to set aside suddenly take on a new life. We kind of settle in it together. You pretend that you care about me. That you are the sensitive one that really understands. You tell me that Worthwhile over there is just a bully. He’s always pushing me to achieve some goal or overcome some obstacle. He doesn’t care about you you tell me. He’s just in it for the attaboys.

It sounds good at first all this talk of laying down my burdens to sit amidst the garbage that you draw out of me. But I’ve started to look around and it seems to me that you’re the bully Worthless. I don’t know why I listen to you at all. You’re a liar and a thief. You want to break me down to make yourself feel better and I’ve been letting you. But no more.

Worthless I’m not feeding you anymore.


Freedom > Security

Those who would give up essential Liberty, to purchase a little temporary Safety, deserve neither Liberty nor Safety.

From “Pennsylvania Assembly: Reply to the Governor, 11 November 1755” by Benjamin Franklin

I remember years ago I had a friend. Okay I’ve had many friends over the years but I’m thinking of one in particular right now. Anyway, we were having a conversation one day and I asked him a question and his answer really surprised me.

The question I asked was this: “What is more important to you, freedom or security? His answer was quick and sure, “Security.”

For context I want you to know that this conversation took place in the mid 90’s. So there had not yet been 9/11, no war on terror, no department of Homeland Security. Nothing like that at all. We were walking down the street safe as could be yet he was thinking about security. I was truly shocked to hear this kind of sentiment come from an American. I mean really this is the land of the free and the home of the brave right? How could someone living in the most free most prosperous country ever be ready to trade any of that liberty for some small safety or security? I was not prepared to hear that then.

So fast forward to today. I’m still not prepared to hear it. I’m not ready to trade any freedom for security and I’m not ready to give up any liberty for safety. The Bill of Rights has served this nation well for 229 years and I don’t see any reason it can’t continue to serve today.

Our Declaration of Independence says this: “That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed”. But we have many politicians today that appear to think they are the power themselves. These elected officials seem to have forgotten that all of the authority they have comes from us. I feel like if I could sit down with one of them just as the meeting was starting I’d like to say, “Go fetch me a glass of water you work for me not the other way around.”

I know that would be disrespectful and the thought is unworthy of me but that’s where I am right now. My emotions are a mess. On one hand I’m angry that some bureaucrat is telling me I must wear a muzzle, but on the other I am filled with compassion for those who have impacted by the virus. I want to wear the mask to show my respect for their feelings. I saw my very dear friend in the store today. We always greeted one another warmly with a hug. But not today, no today it was a sad wave of longing for some human connection.

I don’t know how much longer I can take this. How long before a little subversion becomes something more? I know that I’m not alone in this. Please let me know how you are doing and what we can do to help each other.

Father God these are troubling times. I turn to you who alone are worthy of my worship. I know that during this period of sickness and unrest my behaviors and thoughts have not always been pleasing to you. Please forgive me. Thank you for your mercy and grace. Thank you for providing me a way to have a relationship with you through your Son, my Savior, Jesus. Please deliver to me the spiritual and emotional strength to be a good and pleasing witness for you and your Kingdom. Amen

The more that things change…

So this coming Sunday (26 April 2020) will be the sixth week in a row since I have been able to meet with the congregation of the church where I am the pastor. Six weeks ago my wife pointed an iPad at me in an empty sanctuary and we went live. It was not the best production but it served to get us started.

Don’t think though that it was just she and I that made this happen. There are many others and I want to thank them all. So thank you Kenny and George. Thank you Carl and Paul as well. I can’t leave out Dr Steve and brother DJ. I know that you all put your heart into the work that you did and I know that I can count on you to continue to make great things for us going forward.

My greatest thanks though must go to my wife Diana and my friend Mary. These two have put in so many hours that I’ve lost count (ok I wasn’t really punting). They have turned our weakness into strength. We have all learned a lot about ourselves and each other as we navigate all of this change. Our next challenge will be to figure out how to continue this higher level of streaming when we are back together as a congregation. But I am confident that we will.

This is important because it seems to be working. We are engaging more people than we have for quite some time. I believe that the message of Jesus is reaching many new people and more people are connecting with that message. Our ability to be able to reach people is being multiplied. We are making real connections with believers around the world.

Here is an email I received a couple of days ago:
Dear most respected pastor Peter Ceccardi
Greetings to you from our Heavenly father and soon coming savior Jesus Christ!
How are you and your family especially your country? We are praying for you and the situations from there.

We heard every news from your country through the news telecast and terrible incidents.

We are also in the strict lockdown down days because of corona virus, our government extended lock down days till next month may 3rd. Our church believers ,orphans and some of our poor tribal pastors in very need of food and groceries. Some of our poor church believers sleeping with empty stomachs with their family and their children because there is no way to go outside to do any labour work.

Our Government passed rules not to conduct any Sunday services so; we did not conducted Sunday services or any gathering from last four weeks.

Please pray for me and my family, church believers and the poor tribal pastors.

In his service
Pastor mary

For those of you that don’t know this India is the 10th most dangerous place in the world to be a Christian. I know this because for many years outside of my family and congregation most of my prayer efforts are for persecuted believers around the world. This is the first time someone from one of these places has reached out to me for contact. I get prayer requests often through various organizations or by the church website but these never include a way to reach a person directly.

At first I was going to ignore this request fearing it was a scam of some kind. But as I prayed about it my heart softened. I will be reaching out to Pastor Mary. I’ll keep you posted.

I stand with Hong Kong

Ok it’s been a while since I’ve been here. It’s not like I haven’t been writing. Ive just been neglecting this particular place. I really want to get here more often to write. I have been thinking a lot about the state of the nation though and I have to admit that these are waters that seem a little bit dangerous. I go to Twitter and see the hatred that gets passed around as wisdom or righteousness and I wonder how my thoughts will be viewed. But then I realize that very few people will actually take the time to read these posts and I feel my courage return.  

I saw in the news today there was a “controversy” in the NBA. The General Manager of the Houston Rockets got himself in some hot water because he tweeted his support for the protesters in Hong Kong.

Since when is it wrong in America to support people who want freedom from a brutal communist government? A horrible dictatorship where millions are put to forced labor, have their organs harvested and women are re-educated by being raped and sterilized. I have a problem with that. If you don’t we’re going to have difficulty being friends. 

I’m not naive, I know that there are nuances to geopolitics that are very likely over my head. However I do understand basic human rights and I can see when they are being violated. 

I pray for China and Chinese Christians every day. I have been following the story of Pastor Wang Yi since he was arrested in December last year. 

I’ll have more to say about this soon. 

Love you all